Creating my day

My son is off with his Dad. I feel sad. Incomplete. I am resisting all that is. I am resisting this split in our family.

I am caught in the idea of what MY family should be.
I am caught in MY judgment of what would make ME happier.
I am caught in MY thoughts of 'I haven't been able to do enough to be accepted, loved and valued.'
I am caught in my feelings of worthlessness, poverty, fear, loneliness.

Me Me Me. There is so much of me wrapped up in this. And then...
... around me are beautiful souls inviting me home... yes calling their home, MY home. They are MY family. Friends sending me love in emails. Blessed by people offering to help me, support me.
I almost missed it in my grief and sadness.

Both realities are always present.
Today I choose the reality of love and beauty. It takes more effort in some relationships, but I will focus on the ones where it is so evident. I will begin with holding myself; it is okay to not like some of what is happening. It is okay to resist this situation. It is also okay to choose love, attending to others with love to open my heart.