Wednesday, May 30, 2012


Today I learned of impending loss. A disappointment. My expectations are not being met. I am feeling sad, frustrated and even guilt.

Even in the face of loss, if I can focus on offering love, nourishment and kindness, even just presence, I can sense a light in my heart. Cheerfulness is so much easier when I focus on what I give.

Saturday, May 5, 2012

Chaos and Contentment

One thing is certain, life is full of change and that change often feels like chaos.
A week of a dancing carefree spirit and sparkling eyes has transformed to a week of persistent doing and resolve to stay grounded.
The mind has become more animated and critical. And my heart longs for the bliss and stillness of last week.

So where is the peace and contentment in this moment?
I catch it subtly lurking behind the words, "Mom, will you pass the ball with me?" I see it in the shadows of the dog prancing back and forth to the door, looking at me expectantly and the flowers beginning to open in the morning sunshine. In the stillness in my office it whispers as I hear the conversations of coworkers in the hall. The methodical movement of my body softens as I watch others rushing in for their Yoga class, determined to find 'their' spot before it is taken by someone else.

Home is not the sattvic environment of the Himalayan Institute, but this is also my life. This is where I can practice feeling safe in the midst of change and chaos. Home is where I can practice receiving the experience beyond the obvious appearance. I can feel the desire for my attention from those who love me, the courage in the petals opening to the warmth of the sun and the desire to be heard and to help in conversations around me. Even the hurried and determined nature of those grasping for their spot in the Yoga class reveals the desire for healing, for a connection to oneself.

Because some things do not change, there can be contentment, even in the midst of chaos.