This morning in meditation, a thought past my mind, a memory really. Yesterday as I chatted with a fellow Yogi about purpose, I said, "Arjuna's dharma wasn't fighting the war, it was to seek justice." Now to give you a little background, I was referring to the Bhagavad Gita, a story about Arjuna's discovery of God within himself and realizing the true reality of human existence. We meet Arjuna on the battle field where he is in despair and collapsed, wanting to renounce his role in this war because it will mean killing his own kinsmen. Krishna, who we come to discover is really God, but acting as his chariot driver, is attempting to get Arjuna to understand the bigger reality.
Yesterday, even as I said the words, I was realizing that perhaps I had been looking at what I understood to be my dharma (purpose) without this same perspective. I have gone through the four desires workshop a few times and have worked and reworked my purpose, gaining knowledge also about what stands in the way and what I really desire that will support my purpose. My latest version is I surrender to Divine Grace, radiating my light and sharing my creativity.
I am not a big fan of the surrendering part. But as I was reflecting on my own words and the meaning of that to me, I realize what I am really trying to express is I act with faith. As I think back through the years, I can see that I the times of real success and joy in my life, have been the times I have been willing to just let go and let god as they say. The times I have launched a makeshift raft into a lake and go on an adventure, not really knowing if it will sink or not. When I sold pretty much everything I owned and got in a Mazda GLC and went on a climbing trip. When I gave up having to send and just climbed my best, hoping for the best.
This is what my purpose is... to act with faith and confidence. To shine means I need to act. Not just surrender. It means to share my thoughts, wisdom and knowledge with faith and confidence, from a place of inner joy. So grateful for that conversation yesterday!